I’ve been thinking a lot now about the role of textbooks in not only teaching language, but also forming a further dimension of that language for an other-mother-tongue learner.

I first came across this in Stephen Clarke’s A Year in the Merde, as his protagonist, Paul West, struggles to understand why his colleagues think “My Tea is Rich” is an hilarious name for a chain of British tearooms. They assert that “Ma Tea Eez Reesh eez funny nem. Eatis Ingleesh oomoor” because it parodies “My tailor is rich”, an expression known by the French as a proper English expression since its first appearance in L’Anglais sans peine by Assimil in 1929. Reading Clarke’s book before I arrived in France, I thought it was just a joke, or just case-specific… but no, I’ve heard numerous times “yes, I speak English, my tailor is rich” followed by peals of laughter.

I was even surprised to find that this joke had made it into my bible for all things Anglo, Franco and stereotyped, Asterix in Britain. In the French version, Obelix comments on the tweed worn by a Briton, and asks “c’est cher?” (“Is it expensive?”), to which the Briton replies “mon tailleur est riche” (“my tailor is rich”). In the English version, the allusion is more subtle, being lost in the translation of

- “Does it cost a lot to make up?”
- “Rather! My tailor makes a good thing out of it!”

Another common textbook expression is “Where is Brian? He is in the kitchen”. When I first met Guillaume, we were living in a university dormitory where, by chance, there also lived an American called Brian. As it happened one day, someone was looking for Brian, and he happened to be in the kitchen. I’m sure you can guess how the conversation proceeded. What couldn’t be predicted was Guillaume’s astonished reaction to this seemingly simple flow of question and answer. His jaw dropped and he spluttered, “I didn’t think that actually happened in real life!”

But as sure as there will be traffic jams in Piccadilly Circus, there will be Brians in kitchens, and, I guess, rich tailors… but maybe that’s more of a sign of bygone times.